Its kinda a dirty word, even in weight loss blogging, to say that you’re focussed on weight loss instead of overall health and wellbeing, that you want to get the weight off and faster than you are, it’s all a little bit judged and shied away from. Well screw that, I need to be honest here. I totally believe in caring and loving your body, I don’t hate mine at all, but I’m not comfortable and nor is my frame.
Yup. I’m putting it out there to be accountable and be enthused but also to be honest. I have tried to lose weight this year a number of times, and its not been a productive thing at all.
I’ve been honest lately that weight loss has not been moving, I’ve been maintaining within 3 lbs of my weight but at halfway through the year my weight loss is embarrassingly small. I’ve been trying, I’ll manage it for a while and then I’ll wonder why I’m putting myself through it and eat a yorkie instead saying that I really don’t care (more to come about that attitude next week btw).
So on Monday, I’m committing myself to logging on MFP, I’m committing myself to eating well, I’m committing myself to the slog. I need to get weight off because the reality is while I’m not unhappy with my life, and while my priorities are totally different these days, I am not happy with my weight either. I want to see it come off and I at least want to be in the 190s by the end of the year even if my initial 52 lb target is becoming unrealistic.
I’ve found myself tempted back to the VLCD recently and thats a sign for me that I’m not happy with my size right now, I’m no longer comfortable here, I’ve had my period of adjustment and now its time to move on.
I’m going to need your help, your support and your firm words in order to stay on track. I need to battle through the next few weeks until it becomes routine again and I see some results to spur me forwards.
After a week together Olly will be heading back up north on Monday too, the emotions of our separation are never easy and the urge to eat large quantities are there still.
I’m not necessarily going to be following a “plan” as such, just eating well, cutting crap and understanding how to listen to my body again. Not eating till I’m bursting, topping up with chocolate. I’ll weigh in monday and then I’ll put the scales away for at least a week to allow my body to adjust. I want to see a good result when I step on them again and I find stepping off them for a time quite a good way to get that focus as well.
I’m rambling, and this is a rambly post, but I guess I’m saying I’m here, it’s a priority for me again and I know It Starts With Food.