Yep. I talked last week about my disconnect from the scale. It’s been a long time coming. I love the scale, sometimes I hate it but generally I get on it regularly, several to insane amount of times per week. I’m not particularly proud of it, I hid behind studies that say that people who weigh daily tend to lose more weight than others. I hid the fact that I was a little bit of a bitch for the scale. Up and I was down, down and I was up.
The scale is an inanimate object, it should not have anything to do with my mood for the day or my eating habits. It’s crazy that there was that problem. Even though when the scale does show a loss it can go one of two ways – “I’ve lost X lbs and so this piece of cake won’t damage that too much” or “OMG I’ve gained X lbs, screw it I want that cake”. Yeah. My brain screws me. I let it become a way to have an excuse.
I also started to think about what that number actually represented. It didn’t represent my integrity, my loyalty or my heart, it didn’t represent my role in life and nor did it represent how I lived my life at times. It was just a number that was assigned to me on a particular day. I started to realise how little it actually meant. My life is not a number, it’s far more complex than that.
Since I stopped weighing I’ve felt more motivated to keep my food on track for the longest period in recent times. I am making choices for the healthy not for the quick results on the scale. I feel that I want to see a loss on there, because I want to lose weight, because it reflects that I’m carrying out a healthier lifestyle despite life happening around me. Obviously I have to lose weight, it’s why I started this journey, despite wanting it to be more than about the numbers they still have a part to play. In 3 days I will weigh in for the first time in a week. Honestly that’s a big achievement for me, it may not seem it but disconnecting from those numbers was hard to do but it’s made me more motivated and I’m trying for 30 days next time, but I’d be happy with 14. Hopefully I’ll just forget it’s there until May 1st. Pfft. Yeah right.
So thanks to Maren for giving me the chance to goal myself for the Summer Challenge, this scale thing has been my best one yet.So far I’ve completed 2 out of 4 of my mini goals this week for my Summer Challenge input, I plan to blog on Sunday about it. I’ll be blogging all the pictures of food that I’ve taken this week as well! I’ve been trying to remember to take a photo of everything that I’ve eaten and I can’t wait to share with you what it is.
Hows your relationship with the scales?